Someone once told me that, "God is not mean."

This is terribly simplistic and may possibly even seem counter-Christian, since we all know that "God is love."  But, the Lord has called that phrase to my mind several times recently.  It comes to mind when I am doubting what I am hearing the Lord say to me - and fearful of the consequences of choices.  My personality just tends to over analyze any decision that I am making.  I am also a "verbal thinker" and feel the need to talk out all my thoughts with patient friends and family the Lord has blessed me with :) I am always trying to figure out all my sub-conscience motives, where my "wounds" are hindering me, and checking my desires and thoughts with scripture and lifting them up to the Lord in prayer.  All of this to say -- I think most of the time it is much simpler.

While I am praying for guidance in my life, I am also continuing to read through 1 Samuel.  In Chapter 8, Israel demands the Lord to give them a king.  The Lord warns Israel, through the prophet Samuel against this desire of theirs.  Israel, against God's warning, demands a king anyways.  They change God's mind, and He answers their prayer.

In my first read of this passage, it seems like God is being a patronizing parent, saying "I know what's best for you, but have it your way - and learn for yourself to obey me."  Almost, as if He was leading them into "bad" consequences.  After all, He did create them and already knew everything that would happen.

But, when you go back and focus on the details and everything that happens after God appoints Israel a king, I think God just wanted to give His people the desires of their heart - out of love.  No, God is not a mean God.  I don't think He set a trap and watched Israel fall into it.  I think He wanted to bless them.  God appointed Saul as king, but it was Saul who fell from God's grace, because he did not obey God's commands in war.  And later, we know that the Lord hardened Saul's heart - when God had appointed a little red-headed shepherd boy named David his successor.

The scripture is clear, because God does later appoint David and others as king of Israel, that it was not their desire for a king that was "bad" or sinful - that God gave warning against.  It was the motivation from which Israel asked for a king that was.  1 Samuel 8:7 says "they (Israel) rejected me (God) from being king over them."  God wasn't displeased with their desire for a king, he was displeased with their rejection of Him as their king first.

Point being, God wants to bless us, and give us the desires of our heart.  We have choices, and we can glorify and obey God on any path we choose.

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalms 37:4